Posts tagged ‘analyzing/thinking about stuff’

September 29, 2004

Open your eyes…

Mood : annoyed
Music : Esthero “Windmills of Your Mind”

Sometimes the very changes in your life that you are sure are going to be the most positive end up having the most negative effects on you. And sometimes the things in your life that actually are positive start getting questioned due to the negativity that’s in your life. But those negative things don’t matter anyways. Sometimes people don’t realize their actions and decisions effect you, not just them. And sometimes it’s the very things that other people may perceive as failures that are your actual accomplishments in life.

July 28, 2004

I get what I want… and I never want it again/Rooster-heads

 [5:09 am]
Subject: Rooster-heads

Fake mohawks, faux hawks, tall ponytails… whatever you want to call it does not look good on girls for the most part. The whole let’s take a ponytail and make the top really high thing just makes you look like a farm animal. The rockabilly look is hot. But this is not to be confused with the wanna be punk look. You know how you do a mowhawk? You shave the sides of your head then spike up the middle part. OK?!

Also just a note to guys who fall for this. Just because a girl takes a bottle of peroxide to her hair doesn’t make her suddenly hot if she’s got an ugly face.

Thank you and good night.

[4:07 am]
Subject: I get what I want and I never want it again…
Mood  disappointed
Music Tears for Fears "Mad World"

Have you ever wanted something really badly for a long time… let’s say a car for instance….

You want it for a while and all you can do is think about how much you want it. But you think you can’t ever have it and you probably don’t really deserve to have it. So you don’t even try to find a way to get it. Then someone else gets to buy one but has the money for screwed up reasons. They don’t deserve or appreciate that car. You see the way they drive it around not taking care of it. It makes you mad but really there is nothing you can do about it. And you know if you had it, you’d always get it fixed, drive it carefully, get it washed, etc.

A couple years later you find out you can get the car. In fact, you could have had it all along! But you didn’t know there was such an easy way. Now the owner has abandoned it and it’s all yours if you want it. But it’s so badly damaged. The dents and scratches make it unrecognizable. It’s still technically the same car but you can barely tell. You take it for a test ride because you still kind of consider having it. But all you can do is try to remember what it used to be like. You don’t enjoy what it is now. And you don’t really want to put the time and effort into fixing it because no matter what you do, it still won’t be in its original form.

I think I’d rather take the bus if I have to ’til I find the right car. The car might take me where I want to go easier and faster for now but it’s not worth the repairs and headaches that will soon come with having it.